About a year ago on September 12, 2012 I was diagnosed with a pulmonary embolism (PE) which is a blood clot in the lung. I had absolutely none of the classic symptoms of a PE. Instead my blood clot was found during one of my routine PET-CT scans to check on the progress of my cancer. For some reason people with cancer have a tendency to develop blood clots and I just happened to be one of the lucky ones that got one. I remember getting off the shuttle at the UCSF Parnassus campus and starting to walk to my sister’s flat when I noticed I had a voicemail. It was my nurse practitioner asking me to call her back because “it was kind of an emergency, but kind of not”. At this point I was really nervous thinking that maybe the cancer had spread instead of getting smaller so I called her back. She then told me that I had to go to the Emergency Room to start a regimen of blood thinners because I had a PE. My Lovenox Syringe So, I went to the ER where they gave me my first shot of Lo...
Recently I’ve learned a lot of things about people in my life and I am trying to make an effort to keep away from negativity. Negativity stresses me out and stress is the last thing I need. Someone recently tried to say that karma is the reason I have cancer which left me kind of in shock. I’ll admit I’m not perfect but I definitely don’t think I or anyone deserves cancer. If that’s the way karma worked then why do so many great people get sick and die young, while many evil ones get to live well into old age? The comment made me very upset at the time but now I realize that I have to make an effort not to let negativity like that get me down. Life is too short to worry about what other people think. Maybe they didn’t mean for it to sound the way it did or at least that’s what I’m hoping, but the lesson here is to really think about your words before they come out of your mouth. Another example is talking about how you know someone that died of cancer to someone that has cancer. Altho...
I had my fist appointment with my new oncologist today and it was kind of sad. I miss my oncologist at UCSF. She has been with me on this journey for 5 fucking years and it's hard to say goodbye. I hope that one day we can meet again cuz she was awesome. She got me where I am today. I know that it's just luck though. Not everyone responds to treatment so well like I have and I admit that I feel guilty about that. So many friends in my support groups have died and I'm still here. We really need a fucking cure. My appointment went smoothly for the most part. My new oncologist tried to prescribe decadron which is a steroid but I promptly nixed that. I DO NOT want to get on steroids unless absolutely necessary. I don't like the way steroids make me feel or the fact that they make me fat. It's sounds stupid, I know. But right now I feel relatively well and to me steroids are a last resort. I do not believe I need them at this time. I've been doing fine without them...
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